Becoming a stay at home mom after having an established career can be difficult. Wanting to be a stay at home mom and the financial hardship it may cause is tough too.
Having the courage to follow your dreams and create the life you want for your family though while not knowing how the chips may fall. It takes faith.
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While listening to the Do it Scared podcast one day I listened in on episode 76. Barb was talking with Ruth about growing her online business and her dedication to helping people with creating a nurturing happy home.
Intrigued by her story I wanted to learn more. I reached out to Barb and asked her to do an interview with her. She agreed and shared more of her story with me.
Barb explained to me that her current passion to help others comes from the fact that she wanted to stay home and finally decided to not until her daughter was 16. You may be thinking why so late, but she explains further in her interview.
She encourages other moms not to hesitate on choosing to stay home. Because family is so important and you might regret missing out on that time with your kids. Do what is best for your family.
This interview is one mom’s story and her view.
How many kids do you have?
We have 1 adult daughter. She turns 23 this year. We wanted at least one more child, but life happened and then I found out I have fertility issues. I was diagnosed finally last year with endometriosis. We feel blessed that we were able to have our daughter Moira, and took it as God’s way of knowing what we could handle.
How long have you been a stay at home mom?
I was a stay-at-home mom off and on as Moira was a child but finally made the decision to stay home full-time when she was 15. I really felt like she needed me to be more present in her life and she was starting to have some problems. I really regret not making the decision earlier.
What was the decision like to become a stay at home mom and leaving your career?
When I decided to stay at home full-time, I was in college trying to get a degree in Archaeology with a minor in Geology. I honestly felt like it was something that was expected of me, to get my degree.
I had always been on a science track since I was a kid in school. I had really good grades. But honestly, it wasn’t really what I wanted.
I just never felt like being a homemaker was an option because everyone around me (besides my husband) thought it was a waste of my time and intelligence. And back when my daughter was young there weren’t that many legitimate opportunities to work from home (if there was, they were extremely hard to find).
What is your unique story about becoming a stay at home mom?
We have always been lower-income so staying at home would have been a huge hardship unless I was able to earn money from home. That was also a huge problem. (as noted above there were really no options that I knew of).
I think that was a huge part of my guilt over wanting to stay home. That was ultimately why I want to help other mom’s out there with my blog. I really want to help others live their dream of being a homemaker without sacrificing too much.
What are your favorite mom resources? (ideally, name 3)
I don’t know a lot of mom resources now as I no longer have children at home. But there are some fellow bloggers that I know that have great websites: www.livingwellspendingless.com, www.mommyonpurpose.com, www.farmhouseonboone.com, and “She’s in Her Apron” on YouTube.
What Book(s) Are You Currently Reading?
I read a TON of books. Not very many on parenting, of course. But I love Emily Ley, Melissa K. Norris, Ruth Soukup, Ray Edwards (copywriting book), and The Bible. I also just finished the “Outlander” series finally!
When did you start your business?
I started my blog in the winter of 2018
What inspired you to create an online business and how did you motivate yourself to keep going?
I really wanted to go for the BIG dream my husband and I had to buy a small piece of property and start a homestead and become self-reliant, pay off our debt, and not worry about money anymore.
I saw many people successfully becoming bloggers and making a decent living. I have always been a writer and have a knack for research (I was a librarian when I started my blog).
That was the initial spark. I knew I wanted to help other’s get the resources that I couldn’t find when I was a young mom to be able to stay home and focus on their families.
This became my passion project and if I could create my dream life, I could help others do the same. I keep going because I know that I don’t have the option of failure. I’ve invested to much time and effort to give up now. I just have faith that the path I’m on is exactly where God wants me. That’s what helps me to keep going and not let past regrets weigh me down.
What is your workday like? (Do you wake up early, work late, communicate, what jobs do you do yourself, who do you talk to, etc)?
My husband and I have a very weird schedule. He works swing shift (4p-12:30a). So, we are basically shifted by about 6 hours to everyone else. I get up around 10/11a, take a bath, have my coffee, breakfast. I usually start working around noon. I usually schedule out my work week on Sundays so I know what to focus on each day.
I check my email, pick my task for the day, and get to it. Any given day I could be writing a blog post, making a YouTube video, creating a freebie, writing my newsletter, or working on a graphic design project. I usually schedule social media sporadically throughout the week.
To be honest I have been really trying to focus on one main thing each week. I end up taking a break around 6p-8p to make dinner (my husband comes home for dinner). Then from there, I finish my workday from 8p-12a.
I try to fit cleaning in on low workdays, but for the most part, I do I deep clean of the house on the weekend so I don’t have to do much during the week. I try to meal plan as well, so I don’t have to think about meals too much.
Looking back, what could you of done sooner to have got to that point quicker?
I really wish I had figured out what I wanted to do sooner. The problem was back in the early 2000’s there wasn’t the tech we have now so it would have been difficult. But I wish I had learned about business and marketing when I was getting my associates degree. I wish I had stopped at my Associates’ and stayed home with my daughter. In general, I wish I would have had the courage to just follow my passion and believe in myself. There is never a better time to follow your dreams than NOW.
What should other moms reading this interview – learn about becoming a stay at home mom/work from home mom?
Your family comes first, no matter what! The only way you can look back at your life and not have regrets is by knowing you took a chance. By being brave and living fearlessly, you will always be living an honest life. But always put your family first.
You can do it. Kids grow up too fast, you will always have some regrets. But if you give them your best, your regrets will be small. It’s never going to be easy, but nothing worth having in life is. It’s always going to be a beautiful mess.
Recommended post: How to stay motivated as a stay at home mom
What’s the best piece of mom advice you’ve ever been given?
“The only thing children absolutely need in life is love and consistency”. If you give them these two things everything else just seems to fall into place.
What advice would you give other moms?
Mom guilt is always going to be a thing. I have it to this day. But try to make sure it’s over silly stuff, not the important things like spending enough time with your kids.
As a mom of an only child, it was always foremost in my mind that every one of her first’s was a last. The first time she spoke, her first steps, kindergarten, graduating, etc.… I knew there was a very real possibility I would never experience that again. Make time. Put down the phone, turn off the tv, put away the iPad. There’s plenty of time for that when you’re old.
So there you have it, mamas. Barb shares her insights of going after your dreams and taking the chances of a lifetime.
Barb enjoys writing about content that will help you create & nurture a home you truly love. She has awesome free resources on her blog to help you meet your homemaking goals. You can check out her blog Making it home here.
I want to take the time to say thank you to Barb for allowing me to interview her and sharing her views. I hope you find this interview inspiring.
What are some takeaways from this interview that you enjoyed? Do you have questions for any other SAHM? Would you enjoy more interviews? Share in the comments section below.
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